If it’s cloudy when the groundhog emerges from its burrow on February 2nd, spring will come early. On the other hand, if it’s sunny, and the groundhog sees its shadow, we will have six more weeks of winter. Or so the story goes.

There are so many things wrong with this story that I don’t know where to begin.

Let’s skip over the fact that this groundhog looks suspiciously un-groundhog-like and start with six more weeks of winter. Of course there are going to be six more weeks of winter. For heavens sake, it’s the beginning of February. It would be a minor miracle if there were *only* six more weeks of winter. Eight is more likely, and ten is a distinct possibility. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that this particular story originated in a climate much closer to where rocket scientists typically live.

To put things in perspective, where I live this is what it typically looks like on Groundhog Day.

Which brings us to another problem. Do you really think any groundhog equipped to survive the evolutionary lottery is about to come out of its burrow on a day like this? I don’t either.

With a story this confused, the only sensible (or perhaps foolish) thing to do is to go skating on a good old fashioned (for Canada) outdoor skating rink. By the way, the sun had long since set, so the groundhog didn’t see its shadow. Spring will come early.